December 23, 2005

Please Send Us Façade Stageplays!

by Andrew Stern · , 12:08 am

We’re working on an improved version of the Façade parser, and could use more raw data of what players tend to type to Grace and Trip.

If you’ve played Façade, please do us a big favor and email us the stageplays you generated. Each time you’ve played, a trace of your dialog was automatically saved in c:\Facade\stageplays. (Even if you’ve uninstalled Façade already for some reason ;-) it will leave behind the stageplays folder.)

You can email your stageplay files to us as individual attachments, or ideally your entire stageplays folder as a single zipped-up file, to info -at- interactivestory -dot- net.

Your stageplays will be put through a batch analysis process that makes all lines of dialog anonymous — we won’t be keeping track of who wrote what.

Thanks very much for your help! Happy holidays.

2 Responses to “Please Send Us Façade Stageplays!”


  1. Søren Pold Says:

    Heard a fine and rather long piece in national Danish radio this morning (P1) on Facade. It probably originates from the radio magazine “Harddisken”, where there’ll appearently be something on Christmas eve at 20.55. No normal Dane will listen to P1 at this time, but it’ll be available on the web here: http://www.dr.dk/Videnskab/Harddisken/Programmer/2005/12/1222182130.htm

  2. Joseph Says:

    My first one went like this… your game is addictive by the way.

    GRACE
    Trip, when are you going to get rid of this?

    TRIP
    What, Grace… this?

    GRACE
    Yes, you know how I feel about it –

    TRIP
    I know I know I’ll do it right now, alright?!

    JOE
    hello?

    GRACE
    You know I’ve had to ask you about this several –

    TRIP
    Get off my back! I’ll get rid of it in just a minute!

    JOE
    knock

    GRACE
    Fine, Trip… fine…

    JOE
    you know im here

    (Trip opens the front door.)

    TRIP
    Joe!!

    TRIP
    Hey! I thought I heard someone out here! Great to see you! It’s been a — (interrupted)

    JOE
    hi there trip

    TRIP
    Yeah, hi!

    TRIP
    Wow, it’s so great to see you after so long. — (interrupted)

    JOE
    Are you okay?

    TRIP
    Y — yeah, yeah…

    TRIP
    Come on in!

    JOE
    I thought i heard you two fighting

    TRIP
    Uh, n — no, heh, come in!

    TRIP
    Uh, I’ll — I’ll go get Grace…

    TRIP
    (unintelligable arguing)

    GRACE
    No, no, here we are!

    GRACE
    Joe,

    GRACE
    Hi! How are you? Oh god it’s been such a long time!

    JOE
    why are you fighting?

    GRACE
    Uh… well… (clears throat)

    GRACE
    Well, um… make yourself at home, I guess…

    JOE
    Okay

    JOE
    Hey

    GRACE
    Uh…

    (Trip closes the front door.)

    GRACE
    Oh, ha ha ha!

    JOE
    look

    GRACE
    By the way, you look wonderful!

    JOE
    why thank you

    JOE
    you both look great

    TRIP
    Oh, well, uh, we’ve, uh… we’ve missed you. — (interrupted)

    JOE
    I need a boyfriend.

    TRIP
    Whoa, hold on there my friend, let’s keep that raging libido of yours under control tonight. — (interrupted)

    TRIP
    Hey, I just realized something.

    GRACE
    What…

    JOE
    how have you two been?

    TRIP
    Huh? No, we’re good, I’m good, everything’s good…

    TRIP
    (clears throat)

    JOE
    i don’t believe you Trip

    TRIP
    N — no, remember how you introduced us almost exactly ten years ago tonight?

    JOE
    Yes i do

    JOE
    You are a beautiful couple

    TRIP
    We really want to thank you for years and years of… — (interrupted)

    GRACE
    Should I leave you two alone to keep flirting?

    TRIP
    What? Grace, no –

    GRACE
    No, I don’t want to get in the way… — (interrupted)

    JOE
    what?

    TRIP
    Alright, good, heh heh, maybe you’re on my side tonight after all, ha ha.

    JOE
    I’m gay but he is not

    GRACE
    So, — (interrupted)

    JOE
    Grace

    GRACE
    Oh, um, well… I want to ask you…

    GRACE
    Uhh, you know, everybody tells me the view from our balcony is so wonderful…

    JOE
    It is

    TRIP
    Well, it’s funny how after a full day’s work designing magazine ads, Grace finds the time to decorate… and re-decorate…

    GRACE
    Ha ha, uhh, I guess it’s just the artist in me dying to get out.

    JOE
    Re-decorate?

    GRACE
    Ugh, the layout…

    GRACE
    So, about my decorating…

    GRACE
    Uhh, what I wanted with this room was some kind of post-modern style…

    TRIP
    Yeah, yeah…!

    JOE
    You succeeded

    GRACE
    Oh, well…

    GRACE
    (frustrated sigh) So I was trying to find a style for this room…

    GRACE
    but it is clearly not happening at all. This is such a mess.

    TRIP
    Oh, Grace… — (interrupted)

    JOE
    It is not!

    GRACE
    Uhh!

    TRIP
    See, Grace, as always, you’re the only one unhappy with your decorating.

    GRACE
    Uhh… right, I know, I’ll — (interrupted)

    JOE
    This apartment looks good!

    GRACE
    Oh… well…

    TRIP
    That’s a nice thing to say, I’m sure Grace appreciates that.

    GRACE
    (clears throat)

    (Trip shakes the advice ball.)

    JOE
    Look here

    TRIP
    Oh that — that’s just a little joke advice giver toy thing that I like to consult now and then…

    TRIP
    when I need a little guidance. Ha ha.

    JOE
    what the painting?

    GRACE
    Look I know you love my decorating, everybody loves my decorating. Except for me. Let’s talk about something else, God…

    GRACE
    (big sigh)

    TRIP
    (little sigh)

    TRIP
    Ah, Joe, — (interrupted)

    JOE
    well okay then.

    JOE
    hmm?

    GRACE
    Y — yeah, no, wait, what’s wrong, Trip?

    GRACE
    well…

    GRACE
    Anyway…

    GRACE
    Trip, there’s nothing wrong with disagreeing in front of our friend –

    TRIP
    We’re NOT disagreeing.

    TRIP
    We’re not disagreeing.

    (Trip shakes the advice ball.)

    JOE
    You’re arguing

    TRIP
    Um, uh, wait…

    TRIP
    You think I’m…

    TRIP
    angry…

    TRIP
    Ha ha, ha, oh, you’re — you’re quite the kidder tonight, ha ha ha…

    JOE
    I think Grace is angry.

    GRACE
    Ha, yeah, ha ha…

    TRIP
    Ha ha, heh, never afraid to say anything that pops into your mind, ha heh heh…

    JOE
    I’m an honest friend

    GRACE
    Oh yes, yes, go — (interrupted)

    GRACE
    Uhh, it’s a beautiful picture of the Italian countryside, of course he’ll like it! — (interrupted)

    GRACE
    Yeah, yeah!

    JOE
    hey

    GRACE
    Yes, yes, go take a look…

    JOE
    can i have a drink?

    TRIP
    Yeah, hang on, ooh, I’m going to make you one of my fabulous drinks in just a minute, heh! — (interrupted)

    GRACE
    Uhh, Joe, please don’t encourage him. — (interrupted)

    JOE
    okay

    TRIP
    Yeah, yeah.

    GRACE
    By the way, anybody, join me on the couch if you like.

    JOE
    hey trip

    TRIP
    Um… uhh, Now, — (interrupted)

    JOE
    go to the couch

    JOE
    You need to sit with your girl

    TRIP
    What…? Joe,

    GRACE
    Trip, that was just a well-intentioned little poke in the ribs between friends, that’s all.

    JOE
    Trip, go sit with her.

    JOE
    yeesh

    (JOE sits on the couch.)

    GRACE
    Joe, this is making you uncomfortable. See Trip, was it really worth it to fly us all the way to Italy so you could take that inane picture?

    GRACE
    (little sigh) I’ll take the picture down later tonight before I go to bed.

    TRIP
    Grace…!

    TRIP
    (short petulant sigh)

    JOE
    Grace.

    TRIP
    Wait wait wait — see, uh — I just wanted us to spend time together!

    JOE
    I like his picture

    TRIP
    Oh, uh…

    GRACE
    That’s kind of you, I’m sure Trip’s happy to hear that.

    TRIP
    (clears throat)

    JOE
    Grace, come on. Why so mad?

    GRACE
    Trip thinks carting me off to Europe will, how did you put it, thaw me out a little bit?

    TRIP
    uhh…

    JOE
    Thaw you out?

    GRACE
    Wait — see — Trip tricked me into going!

    TRIP
    (frustrated sigh)

    JOE
    How?

    TRIP
    Oh, I didn’t think you cared to hear about our Italy trip… (big sigh)

    (Trip shakes the advice ball.)

    JOE
    Of course I do.

    GRACE
    N – no, Trip can get overly obsessed.

    (JOE gets up from the couch.)

    TRIP
    Oh my God, Joe, — (interrupted)

    JOE
    Mind if i look around?

    TRIP
    Uh, well, uh — we need drinks!

    GRACE
    Trip thinks he’s at his classiest when he’s on the serving end of a swizzle stick.

    TRIP
    Why don’t I make us one of my new drink inventions,

    (JOE picks up the advice ball.)

    (The advice ball reads, “Maybe Later”)

    TRIP
    Just leave my little advice toy out of this, okay? It’s not hurting anyone, it just gives advice!

    JOE
    It’s just an 8-ball

    (JOE shakes the advice ball.)

    (JOE puts down the advice ball.)

    TRIP
    (little sigh) (clears throat)

    TRIP
    So… I should make you one of my drink inventions…

    GRACE
    It’s a secret — Trip doesn’t even like the taste of alcohol. — (interrupted)

    JOE
    Yes please

    TRIP
    Ah, Joe, you are an adventurous drinker, like me.

    GRACE
    Joe, I think Trip is pressuring you too much… how about just a simple glass of white wine?

    TRIP
    (exhale very tense)

    JOE
    Okay, white wine please

    TRIP
    Yeah, no, I’m going to make this drink for us!

    TRIP
    Our friend is here, we’re going to enjoy ourselves, that’s all there is to it!

    GRACE
    (frustrated sigh)

    TRIP
    Grace, everybody loves my drinks, you know that, don’t you? Everybody!

    GRACE
    Well, of course Trip, after all, you got enough practice when you were a real bartender.

    TRIP
    What?

    JOE
    Look , let me try it

    GRACE
    In college, you were a bartender.

    TRIP
    How do you know about that?

    GRACE
    Oh I know you were trying to keep it a big secret, but… one time my friends and I went slumming off-campus to some crappy bar in the sticks, and we saw you there.

    TRIP
    Oh, that’s great.

    TRIP
    Uhh, you’re driving me insane!

    JOE
    Trip! Why did you keep that secret

    GRACE
    What, what are you saying?

    TRIP
    You hide things from me! You’re so distant! You…

    TRIP
    You do, you hide things from me!

    GRACE
    (impatient sigh) — (interrupted)

    JOE
    You hid being a bartender

    GRACE
    Alright, yeah, fine…

    GRACE
    Everyone tries to explain everything…

    GRACE
    Trip, our whole marriage, you’re so… controlling!

    TRIP
    Oh, god…!

    TRIP
    Carting you off to Europe…

    TRIP
    Grace, I do one little thing wrong, and you’re cold and distant! Just one thing wrong, that’s all it takes!

    GRACE
    Oh, my God…!

    JOE
    You two need to look at something

    TRIP
    Alright, you know what, Joe,

    TRIP
    I’m going to ask you something.

    GRACE
    Trip –

    TRIP
    Grace, let me ask our guest a question.

    JOE
    Go ahead…

    TRIP
    Joe, yes or no…

    TRIP
    Each person in a marriage is supposed to try really hard to be _in sync_ with the other, right?

    JOE
    Of course.

    GRACE
    What…?! — (interrupted)

    GRACE
    Oh, alright… yes…

    GRACE
    Just admit it, Trip, admit it, we have an shitty marriage! We’ve never been really happy, from day one! Never, goddammit!

    TRIP
    Oh, god…!

    TRIP
    Uhh! Yeah, go on, get away from me!

    TRIP
    I can’t frigging take this!

    JOE
    But you were happy back then….

    TRIP
    Oh… Shit!

    JOE
    look at your wedding picture.

    TRIP
    What are you saying? What?

    GRACE
    What, I can’t hear you, are you talking to me?

    TRIP
    I was not talking to you!

    JOE
    Trip , could you come here?

    TRIP
    Joe, this has never ever happened before…!

    TRIP
    uhh…

    (JOE hugs trip.)

    GRACE
    Joe, from what you said before, about forgiving… I think we’ve already learned something about Trip.

    JOE
    Im so sorry

    TRIP
    Oh, we’re talking about me again, are we?

    GRACE
    What?

    GRACE
    Trip, it’s your fault — ten years ago, freshly married and just out of college,

    GRACE
    you convinced me to go into advertising, instead of art!

    TRIP
    What?

    GRACE
    If it weren’t for you, I could be a real artist by now.

    TRIP
    Uhh… Joe, uhh…

    JOE
    Advertisers make more money.

    TRIP
    Look around here. We’re doing well, really well.

    GRACE
    God, Trip, I can’t believe even now you’re still…

    TRIP
    Oh yeah, you’d never admit that I’ve created a good life for us.

    GRACE
    Dammit Trip!

    JOE
    This is a nice apartment, you know

    TRIP
    Christ, Joe, can we possibly talk any more about Grace’s stuff tonight? (frustrated sigh)

    JOE
    thats not what i meant

    JOE
    Grace, can’t you forgive him?

    GRACE
    Let’s keep talking about Trip.

    GRACE
    Damn it, Trip, you and my parents are always planning these stupid trips I have to go on..

    TRIP
    They’re vacations! Expensive ones at that!

    GRACE
    Of course nobody thinks to ask me what I want.

    JOE
    Grace, this is art.

    GRACE
    Uhh, this painting, well… mmm… see, all I really wanted was something personal and, uh… beautiful and special…

    TRIP
    Grace…

    GRACE
    But I just… mmm… no, I — I just get so depressed and angry when I look at it!

    TRIP
    Jesus…!

    JOE
    Then look at your wedding picture

    GRACE
    God, that wedding picture… I hate it.

    TRIP
    Grace, how can you say –

    JOE
    why?

    GRACE
    You — (interrupted)

    GRACE
    Why?

    GRACE
    Joe, yes, that helps me. Trip, our wedding was just one more example of how things work in our marriage.

    TRIP
    (frustrated sigh)

    JOE
    Your wedding was great.

    GRACE
    Look, if we’re going to talk about marriage, all I can say is, it doesn’t turn out the way you expect it to.

    TRIP
    Grace…

    JOE
    You both looked so happy.

    TRIP
    Ah!

    GRACE
    You’re saying I’m… not depressed? Uhh… well…

    GRACE
    See, Joe, I… uhh… I’ve been very lonely.

    JOE
    Why are you lonely?

    GRACE
    Ah!

    JOE
    You have trip!

    TRIP
    Joe, you’re saying… I’m not a loving person? Uhh… no…

    TRIP
    Grace, you know I’ve never wanted anyone but you…

    JOE
    Trip, do you love her?

    GRACE
    Aha!

    TRIP
    What?! Are — are you trying to say… I might not love Grace?!

    GRACE
    What?!

    TRIP
    Jesus, I — is that… that’s what you think is going on here?! — (interrupted)

    JOE
    No, it’s a question.

    GRACE
    No?

    JOE
    Do you love trip?

    TRIP
    Ah!

    GRACE
    What…? Are you trying to say… I might not love Trip?

    TRIP
    What?!

    GRACE
    Oh, god, I — is that… is that what you think is happening here?!

    TRIP
    That’s, that’s — that’s what you think?!

    JOE
    Im not saying anything.

    GRACE
    No?

    TRIP
    Oh my God… I cannot frigging believe this… uhh…

    JOE
    Do you love him?

    TRIP
    Uhh…

    TRIP
    Okay, I’ve had enough of this bullshit!!

    JOE
    Do you love each other?

    TRIP
    Joe, I know what you’re hinting at, okay?!

    TRIP
    about us…

    TRIP
    about our marriage…

    TRIP
    Do you two want the truth? Huh?

    JOE
    yes

    TRIP
    Grace?

    GRACE
    Yes…!

    TRIP
    See, Joe, I’ve been paying attention to what you’ve been saying tonight.

    (JOE comforts grace.)

    TRIP
    Joe, Quit interrupting me, let me speak!

    JOE
    Okay

    TRIP
    You’ve really been pushing me tonight.

    TRIP
    It makes me wonder if you’re really my friend or not.

    GRACE
    Trip!

    TRIP
    Joe, I ask you this — yes or no…

    TRIP
    Do you really think that…

    TRIP
    flirting with me…

    TRIP
    praising Grace…

    TRIP
    criticizing me…

    TRIP
    saying that Grace is not loved…

    TRIP
    saying that Grace is depressed…

    TRIP
    and worst of all,

    TRIP
    suggesting that Grace doesn’t love me…

    TRIP
    but especially what you said about being in sync with each other in a marriage…

    TRIP
    that all that is supposed to help us realize something about us?

    TRIP
    Is what you’ve said tonight supposed to add up somehow, to something?

    TRIP
    Is it? I just want a yes or no.

    JOE
    That is up to you.

    TRIP
    No, Joe, just give me a yes or no.

    JOE
    Yes.

    TRIP
    Right.

    TRIP
    Grace…

    TRIP
    uhh…

    TRIP
    I forced you to marry me, didn’t I.

    TRIP
    When I proposed to you, in front of your parents, on Christmas Eve, and…

    TRIP
    I knew you wouldn’t be capable of saying no.

    GRACE
    You manipulated me.

    GRACE
    And I never did anything about it.

    TRIP
    Yes.

    (JOE sits on the couch.)

    GRACE
    And here we are.

    TRIP
    uhh…

    JOE
    I’m so sorry, guys…

    GRACE
    uhh…

    GRACE
    Oh my God…!

    TRIP
    Joe, I –

    GRACE
    I’m going to give you the truth too, Trip.

    TRIP
    What?!

    GRACE
    Trip…

    GRACE
    uhh…

    GRACE
    In college… I was in love with someone else.

    TRIP
    What?!

    GRACE
    An art major, named Vince.

    TRIP
    An art major named Vince –

    GRACE
    And…

    GRACE
    And I slept with him.

    TRIP
    Y — y — you what?

    GRACE
    The night before you proposed to me.

    (JOE gets up from the couch.)

    GRACE
    I jinxed our marriage, Trip.

    GRACE
    I jinxed it. I’m sorry.

    GRACE
    This is all my fault.

    TRIP
    Uhh… huhh… ho… wow… uhh…

    JOE
    It’s nobody’s fault.

    TRIP
    Uhh… I’m glad you finally told me.

    TRIP
    Jesus…!

    TRIP
    Okay, Joe, Grace, I have one more thing to say…

    GRACE
    Again?!

    TRIP
    Grace…

    TRIP
    uhh…

    TRIP
    I’ve been having an affair.

    GRACE
    Oh my God.

    TRIP
    It’s over now, though.

    GRACE
    But how could you –

    TRIP
    (big sigh) with the client, in, uh, Barcelona.

    GRACE
    Maria.

    TRIP
    I was lonely, Grace.

    TRIP
    But, but, I — I regret it, I really, really regret it.

    TRIP
    uhh…

    JOE
    So you do love her.

    GRACE
    uhh…

    GRACE
    Oh my God…!

    GRACE
    This changes everything…

    JOE
    Both of you cheated…

    TRIP
    Yeah.

    GRACE
    And no, Joe, enough of that already…

    JOE
    Are you going to divorce?

    GRACE
    You finally admitted it — you felt very alone… and you had an affair…

    TRIP
    You feel like you ruined everything from the start…

    TRIP
    I manipulated you into marrying me…

    GRACE
    No, I — I let it happen…

    GRACE
    Joe, we…

    TRIP
    Joe, I –

    JOE
    Yes?

    TRIP
    Look, we — we need to talk…

    GRACE
    Yeah.

    TRIP
    And no, Joe, enough!

    TRIP
    Joe, Thanks for coming over, you… I think you helped us.

    JOE
    I hope you two are okay.

    (Trip opens the front door.)

    JOE
    Bye grace

    (JOE comforts grace.)

    JOE
    bye trip

    (JOE hugs trip.)

    JOE
    goodbye

    JOE
    good luck

    GRACE
    Bye. Thanks.

    (Trip closes the front door.)

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